Giving Back to Veterans

Giving Back – Great Article in Times Mag

Military Handbooks

Here’s a link with great info!

http://www.militaryhandbooks.com

Looking for Vets

There is a court reporter & interview transcriber. She is working on an awesome project to interview / transcribe stories especially from WWI and WWII veterans to publish for the Library of Congress. They are happy to interview any veterans from foreign war, but she is focusing on WWI & WWII due to the fact that this generation’s age. I am helping her look for veterans to interview and students to do the interviewing. She suggests that the students be at least the age of Sophomores or older due to potential graphic content of the stories.

If you know of any veterans who would like to be interviewed or have contacts to schools/students/organizations who would be interested, please let me know & I’ll hook you up with her.

Email Jen at  weisjen@charter.net

Hope Rides Alone

Sgt. Jeffers was a strong soldier and talented writer. He died in Iraq on September 19, 2007. He was a loving husband, brother and son. His service was more than this country could ever grasp – but the least you can do for the man who sacrificed his life for you is listen to what he had to say. Listen up and pay attention to all of the Cindy Sheehans and Al Frankens of the world. To MSNBC, CNN, and CBS. To all who call themselves Americans

Hope Rides Alone.

By Eddie Jeffers

I stare out into the darkness from my post, and I watch the city burn to the ground. I smell the familiar smells, I walk through the familiar rubble, and I look at the frightened faces that watch me pass down the streets of their neighborhoods.

My nerves hardly rest; my hands are steady on a device that has been given to me from my government for the purpose of taking the lives of others.

I sweat, and I am tired. My back aches from the loads I carry. Young American boys look to me to direct them in a manner that will someday allow them to see their families again. And yet, I too, am just a boy….my age not but a few years more than that of the ones I lead. I am stressed, I am scared, and I am paranoid… because death is everywhere. It waits for me, it calls to me from around street corners and windows, and……..it is always there. There are the demons that follow me, and tempt me into thoughts and actions that are not my own…but that are necessary for survival. I’ve made compromises with my humanity. And I am not alone in this.

Miles from me are my brethren in this world, who walk in the same streets… who feel the same things, whether they admit to it or not. And to think, I volunteered for this… And I am ignorant to the rest of the world…or so I thought. But even thousands of miles away, in Ramadi, Iraq, the cries and screams and complaints of the ungrateful reach me. In a year, I will be thrust back into society from a life and mentality that doesn’t fit your average man. And then, I will be alone. And then, I will walk down the streets of America, and see the yellow ribbon stickers on the cars of the same people who compare our President to Hitler.

I will watch the television and watch the Cindy Sheehans, and the Al Frankens, and the rest of the ignorant sheep of America spout off their mouths about a subject they know nothing about. It is their right, however, and it is a right that is defended by hundreds of thousands of boys and girls scattered across the world, far from home. I use the words boys and girls, because that’s what they are. In the Army, the average age of the infantryman is nineteen years old. The average rank of soldiers killed in action is Private First Class.

People like Cindy Sheehan are ignorant. Not just to this war, but to the results of their idiotic ramblings, or, at least I hope they are. They don’t realize its effects on this war. In this war, there are no Geneva Conventions, no cease fires. Medics and Chaplains are not spared from the enemy’s brutality because it’s against the rules. I can only imagine the horrors a military Chaplain would experience at the hands of the enemy. The enemy slinks in the shadows and fights a coward’s war against us. It is effective though, as many men and women have died since the start of this war. And the memory of their service to America is tainted by the inconsiderate remarks on our nation’s news outlets.

And every day, the enemy changes…only now, the enemy is becoming something new. The enemy is transitioning from the Muslim extremists to Americans. The enemy is becoming the very people whom we defend with our lives. And they do not realize it. But in denouncing our actions, denouncing our leaders, denouncing the war we live and fight, they are isolating the military from society… and they are becoming our enemy.

The Senate Democrats and peace activists like to toss the word “quagmire” around and compare this war to Vietnam. In a way they are right, this war is becoming like Vietnam. Not the actual war, but in the isolation of country and military. America is not a nation at war; they are a nation with its military at war. Like it or not, we are here, some of us for our second, or third times; some even for their fourth and so on. Americans are so concerned now with politics, that it is interfering with our war. Terrorists cut the heads off of American citizens on the Internet… and there is no outrage, but an American soldier kills an Iraqi in the midst of battle, and there are investigations, and sometimes soldiers are even jailed…for doing their job.

It is absolutely sickening to me to think our country has come to this. Why are we so obsessed with the bad news? Why will people stop at nothing to be against this war, no matter how much evidence of the good we’ve done is thrown in their face? When is the last time CNN or MSNBC or CBS reported the opening of schools and hospitals in Iraq? Or the leaders of terror cells being detained or killed? It’s all happening, but people will not let up their hatred of Bush. They will ignore the good news, because it just might show people that Bush was right.

America has lost its will to fight. It has lost its will to defend what is right and just in the world. The crazy thing of it all is that the American people have not even been asked to sacrifice a single thing. It’s not like World War Two, where people rationed food, and turned in cars to be made into metal for tanks. The American people have not been asked to sacrifice anything. Unless you are in the military or the family member of a service member, it’s life as usual…the war doesn’t affect you. But it affects us. And when it is over, and the troops come home, and they try to piece together what’s left of them after their service…where will the detractors be then?

Where will the Cindy Sheehans be to comfort and talk to soldiers and help them sort out the last couple years of their lives, most of which have been spent dodging death and wading through the deaths of their friends? They will be where they always are, somewhere far away, where the horrors of the world can’t touch them. Somewhere where they can complain about things they will never experience in their lifetime; things that the young men and women of America have willingly taken upon their shoulders.

We are the hope of the Iraqi people. They want what everyone else wants in life: safety, security, somewhere to call home. They want a country that is safe to raise their children in. Not a place where their children will be abducted, raped, and murdered if they do not comply with the terrorists demands. They want to live on, rebuild and prosper. And America has given them the opportunity, but only if we stay true to the cause, and see it to its end.

But the country must unite in this endeavor…we cannot place the burden on our military alone. We must all stand up and fight, whether in uniform or not. And supporting us is more than sticking yellow ribbon stickers on your cars. It’s supporting our President, our troops and our cause. Right now, the burden is all on the American soldiers. Right now, hope rides alone. But it can change, it must change. Because there is only failure and darkness ahead for us as a country, as a people, if it doesn’t. Let’s stop all the political nonsense, let’s stop all the bickering, let’s stop all the bad news, and let’s stand and fight!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eddie’s father, David Jeffers, writes:

I’m not sure how many letters or articles you’ve ever read from the genre of “News from the Front,” but this is one of the best I’ve ever read, including all of America’s wars.

As I was reading this, I forgot that it was my son who had written it. My emotions range from great pride to great sorrow, knowing that my little boy (22 years old) has become this man.

He is my hero.

God bless.

Though Eddie is no longer with us, you can help to let his voice be heard. And pass his words on to others…

HAD IT NOT BEEN FOR THE MILITARY THERE WOULD BE NO AMERICA

Say Thank You

http://www.gratitudecampaign.org/fullmovie.php

I thought this was very cool!

Home 3 years and what now?

So my husband will have been home 3 years this June from his tour in the middle east. Even now, 3 years later, issues and problems are revealing their ugly head. We have had a rough few months. My husband suffers from PTSD and it has dramatically impacted our family. So many families think that issues will develop within the first year, but its only now 3 years later that they are being discovered.

What took so long ..well I think there are many reasons, but here are a few of my top.

• Denial. I was so happy to have him home, I didn’t want anything to wrong.
• He was in denial. He wanted to make everything better because he left.
• We tried to “go back to normal” but who really goes back to normal. Normal doesn’t exist.
• Life happens. You get busy and just go through the motions, until you realize, your moved further away than you thought.

Who knew? That after this much time, our greatest tests could come. After talking to many families, I discovered many families dealing with the same thing?

Are you?

The Little Things

When my husband deployed, it was the little things I missed. Snuggling up at night, downloading each other on the day’s events, the smell of his scent, and how he’d know just what to do when I was upset and more. When he came home, it was the little things that drove me nuts, how he didn’t know the girl’s schedules, he got in my space and messed things up and how he just didn’t get it.

Even now the little things are BIG THINGS! This weekend after an extremely long conference I was running, I came home and he had run a bath, massaged my feet and legs and took care of everything. That little thing was a HUGE thing.

Little things added up over time to big things. However, it can be easy to over look the other little things as well!

You Don’t Have to Do it All – Learning to Say No

“Hey, can you do me a favor?” We hear it all of the time. Everyone thinks military families are loaded with spare time and energy. All I’m doing is swimming knee-deep in laundry, dishes, school projects, pay problems, volunteer duties, and doctor appointments. Did I mention I am doing this all by myself because my loved one is serving our country! I have all the time in the world for everyone else, right? Wrong!

No wonder we are so stressed – we’re afraid to say NO.” A two-letter word, which I seem to have no problem saying to my kids or spouse, so how come it’s so hard to say to those who live outside our front door? “No” is a very powerful and very freeing word.

How strange that people often assume you have increased availability given that you are a volunteer.  How many unwanted things have you ended up doing because you didn’t say “no”? Most of the time we say ‘yes’ because we can’t think of any reason for not cooperating.

The main reason for saying no should be that the request to do does not fit into our goals. At first this may seem like a selfish response. Yet if our priorities are straight, then we will have already taken into account the needs and goals of others, at least those goals to which we are able to respond in a reasonably appropriate and effective manner. Learning to say “no” also involves accepting your own capabilities.

Say No – Firmly and Frequently
No should be said often. Why? It’s liberating! It’s a way of standing up for yourself. Try it on for size. Repeat the following, “No, I will not take on one more task which will completely mess up my already scheduled day!” “No, I will not allow you to plan my day for me.” “No, I will not.” Get the picture? No allows you to reclaim some of your lost free time. If you don’t find yourself saying it often enough – get busy! They sometimes forget you are not their personal assistant, maid, chauffer, launderer, accountant, etc.

Tips to say ‘No’
Here is a smart way to determine what you can truly commit to: Say you will check your calendar and call the individual back later. When you are not making a quick decision and have time to really mull things over, you’ll be surprised at how many of these “great” opportunities don’t really seem so great.

Don’t take something on simply because you can squeeze it into an already busy schedule. Sometimes it is best to say “no” to something that might only be a drain on your reserves, of time or emotions! By saving your “yes” decisions for things that you can give your all to, you are not only doing a favor to yourself, but to whomever is requesting your help.

On your personal scheduling system,  make sure to have both your work and personal goals and activities scheduled in. This allows you to say, “Let me check my planner.” And then reply with, “Oh, it looks like I am booked at that time (that day, that week, that hour, etc)”. Don’t feel obliged to give explanations – just a simple I am booked at this time will do. Remember this includes personal time. It is just as important to respect yourself by including time for a massage or a lunch date with a friend, as it is to include time for a doctor’s appointment.

Friends, family, command and other families may make this difficult for you. “Well what are you doing? Why can’t you do it? Why can’t you come?” Stick with your guns. Simply say, “I am sorry I can’t at that time. Maybe it will work out in the future.” Don’t feel obliged to give details unless you want to.

Allow your decisions to be pro-active (in your control) rather than re-active (in someone else’s control). This gives you a chance to look at your priorities and see if this opportunity fits.

Mission: Home Again – Part 3 Education and Recognition

Another reason for volunteers and families to stay involved are EDUCATIONAL OFFERINGS on beneficial topics. These are some of the topics they might find helpful. You can bring in guest speakers to address these.

• Stress Management
• VA Benefits
• Marriage Enrichment
• Conflict Management
• Reunion and Reintegration
• Effective Communication

Volunteers love to be rewarded for their efforts. Plan a REWARD AND RECOGNITION event. This could be a ball or other formal event.
• Recognize volunteer efforts in your FRG. Not enough can be said or done to thank your volunteers!
• Work in conjunction with command. They may have service member awards to be presented. You can combine efforts into one event. In Meeting Magic for FRG’s, you’ll find additional ideas for recognizing volunteers and family  members.

Mission: Home Again – Part 2 Assessment

Don’t assume you know what the families need. By assuming, you run the risk of decreasing involvement because families won’t find value in what you are offering because it doesn’t apply to them. So ASK!

Conduct an Assessment with your families

• Work in conjunction with command and/or Chaplain on pulse checks of service members and their families. Your local family program office may have already conducted an assessment. Take a look at it if possible.
• Talk to families about their concerns
• Have families fill out a survey via the web or at reunion briefs and activities.

Use this information in setting up educational offerings and provide activities and resources that meeting their needs. By utilizing the information gathered, you’ll know that you are providing “value” and information your family needs to be “ready”